Ted sat at a table in the campus cafeteria. It was evening and the cafeteria was almost deserted. On his tray sat a burger and fries, growing colder by the minute, but Ted took little notice of them. He was too absorbed in the newspaper he was reading. The pages featured stories about a mysterious poltergeist creating havoc at several public places all over the city in the last few days. At a shopping mall, a biker bar, a restaurant, the locker room of a local pro football team, a nightclub featuring male strippers. Ted shook his head in disbelief as he read the accounts. Jeez, there’s no telling what that crazy chick is liable to do next, he thought…

It had been days since Jenny disappeared, and Ted had been worried sick about what had become of her. Or what kind of trouble she was liable to get into. For an otherwise smart girl, sometimes she could act like such an airhead… But more importantly, there was no telling how long the invisibility formula would last. Sure it’s safe, perfectly non-toxic, but there was no way to determine duration. He had tried to explain that to her the other night, but she just wouldn’t listen (God, she could be stubborn!) Since that night, he tried to do some rough calculations to get an idea of how long it would last, but he just didn’t have enough data; only Jenny knew the exact chemical combinations; without those, Ted wouldn’t be able to even make an guess. For all he knew, the formula could wear off at any moment….or it could be permanent.

His thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the chair opposite him suddenly pulling itself away from the table, and moving itself partially back in again. "If you’re not gonna eat that, can I have it? I’m starved!" a familiar voice said. His tray of food suddenly slid away from him and the paper and foil unwrapped themselves from the burger, which then floated up into the air…and promptly started to disappear into thin air. Fortunately, Ted had tremendous self-control, so he only jumped about a foot out of his chair and his newspaper didn’t scatter TOO far around the floor. When he finally managed to collect his thoughts and speak somewhat coherently, he asked, "Jenny? Is that you?"

"No, it’s Claude Rains! Who else would it be?"

Ted was relieved that she had returned safe & sound and (with trembling hands) started to collect the scattered newspaper. He told her how worried he’d been about her and about his concerns about the formula’s duration. But Jenny barely listened; instead, she was too preoccupied with virtually inhaling the burger, fries and soda. Ted soon found himself at a loss for words; he stared fascinated at the food vanishing into thin air. Jenny finally noticed and asked, "What are you looking at?"

"The food, it just disappears."

"So?"

"I mean I can’t see it. If you’re invisible, I would think I’d be able to see the masticated food going down your esophagus and into your stomach, but I can’t; instead it just –"

"EEEEWWWWW!!! Do you mind? I’m trying to eat! Don’t gross me out!"

"Sorry." Ted was silent again and continued to reassemble his newspaper. He picked up a page and looked it over. "Well, according to this, you’ve been busy. Jeez, did you really tie up that store security guard with a bed sheet?"

Jenny sighed wearily, "I was just trying to get some sleep, right? Then Barney Fife comes barging in, sticks a flashlight in my face, waking me up out of a sound sleep. I tell him to beat it. Then he starts reaching his hands out, getting all touchy-feely. I slapped him, told him to knock it off, but he keeps making a pest of himself. He just wouldn’t go away, so I slugged him & tied him up. Then I went back to sleep. That’s all. Jeez, you always make such a big deal out of everything…"

Ted simply stared open-mouthed at the empty chair opposite him. Then he looked back at the paper, "Says the poor guy’s going to be on leave of absence for a while. Something about being ‘under observation.’" Jenny snorted dismissively. Ted read further. "Did you really start a food fight at Marie Callenders’?"

Jenny sighed loudly, "Look, I was hungry, all right? I was just trying to get something to eat, that’s all.."

"It says here that by the time the cops showed up, the place looked like the Three Stooges had been there." Jenny released another long, drawn-out "Oh, Brother" sigh.

"Or this, what’s this about the biker bar and some guy getting a whole pitcher of beer dumped down his pants?" Ted read on.

"Don’t believe everything you read. You know how these newspapers are, they take some minor little incident and they blow it way out of proportion."

"Or this about the Raiders’ locker room?"

"Shut up! I don’t want to talk about that!"

"The paper is calling it ‘The Pinching Ghost.’ Or this about the Chippendales and something about whipped cream—?"

"WILL YA SHUT UP? I said I don’t want to talk about it!"

The few people remaining in the cafeteria turned their heads to see where the loud female voice was coming from. Ted leaned forward and whispered, "Will you please keep your voice down."

"Sorry."

"Jenny, will you please come back to the lab? As I tried to tell you before, that formula is still unpredictable. It can wear off at any time, or it may be permanent. I haven’t been able to finish my calculations yet, but—"

"Who do you think you’re talking to, one of those boneheads you tutor? I’m the one who created the formula, remember? I know what it can and can’t do. As for its duration, well, you said yourself it’s unpredictable; the only way to find out for sure how long it’ll last is to test it, and that’s what I’m doing."

"But what happens if it wears off suddenly, without warning?"

"Well, that’s a chance I’ll have to take. Either way, I’m not going to worry about it."

"Jenny, we need to work on this. We need to start working on a reagent to make you visible again."

"Whoa! Hold the phone! Who says I want to get visible again? Maybe I’m happy the way I am, did you ever think of that?"

Ted simply stared at the empty chair.

"Sure!" Jenny went on, "Maybe I like being invisible! This is like a dream come true for me, and I’m going to enjoy it! I’ve been able to see things, do things and go places that I never would have been able to before! I can do anything I want, go anywhere I want, and nobody can stop me, because they can’t see me! So to tell you the truth, Ted, I’m in no big hurry to get visible again. Frankly, I don’t care if I DO stay invisible permanently."

Ted flashed back to recall Jenny’s stunning appearance, and reflexively muttered, "What a waste…"

"What?"

"Nothing, nothing…" Ted replied automatically. "Look, will you at least give me the exact formula so I can do some calculations on it? Will you do that at least?"

Jenny sat silently for several minutes before answering. "Sorry, Ted, I’m afraid not. This formula is just too important. You’ve seen all the movies: ‘If this were to fall into the wrong hands…’ You know the rest. The fewer people who know about it the better. The responsibility for it should be mine alone."

Ted bit his tongue as he pondered how personal responsibility and Chippendales & whipped cream could possibly go together, but he kept his thoughts to himself. Instead, he simply said, "I still wish you’d come back so I can at least keep an eye out for signs of the formula wearing off."

Jenny paused before answering. "I don’t know. Maybe you’re right. Maybe. In time, maybe I will come back. But right now, there’s still so many things I want to do yet."

"Like what?"

"Well, like…" Jenny paused again, then laughed, "Well, like having fun with you! Don’t think I’m through with you yet, pal!" She laughed as she playfully pulled his cap down over his face.

"Very funny, very funny." Ted said as he straightened out his cap. "Seriously though, what else is so important for you to do right now?"

"Well, let’s see, there’s…" Jenny paused, then said quietly, "There’s getting even with Tiffany Nelson."

"Who?"

"She’s just leaving the cafeteria right now. Oooo, I’ve hated her ever since ninth grade! We were both trying out for cheerleader, and she stepped on my foot & tripped me. I sprained my ankle. Ever since then, she’s always been mean to me, picking on me, making my life miserable. Ohh, how I’ve wanted to get back at her! No, no, this is just too good an opportunity to pass up. I’ve GOT to get even with her! I’ll see you later!" The chair pulled back away from the table, as Jenny got up to leave.

"Jenny? Jenny" Ted called out, but Jenny was gone. The door to the cafeteria opened & closed by itself.